My Decision to Believe a devotion Barbara shared at our end of year luncheon
When I made the decision to believe, through prayer and scripture I learned I wasn’t in control, I just thought I was. I have learned to let go of at least some control. I’ve planned parties and vacations that include my family and then be disappointed because no one wants to come. The new me asks questions about parties and vacations, get reactions from everyone, be patient, pray, wait, and accept the decision, even if it wasn’t my dream because I know it is working within God’s steps for me. I’ve seen the time when I would plant grass seed at my son’s house and be angry and disappointed when they don’t water it so it will grow. These are things I thought they ‘needed’ or ‘should have’ and I love doing things as a surprise (at least I used to) so all that wrapped together is control. When trusting to believe God has a better plan, I have learned to pause, ask, and listen and to accept silence as a ‘move on’.
Faith is easier when you make the decision to believe. It’s taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase. This is extremely difficult for me. I have been the person who needs to know all the answers rather than jumping out on a leap of faith. Because let’s face it, even when we think we know what it’s going to look like at the top of the steps, if it’s not God’s plan you’ll be falling down that staircase and starting over. As we have aged, we have seen the top of the staircase for some things: getting married, having kids, getting older, losing parents, and losing husbands. But we are in the middle of the staircase and still climbing with much of life still ahead - like growing older, caring for our husbands and them caring for us, helping our children and grandchildren, nurturing others in our family, church, and community and many other things. Some days we start at the bottom of the staircase all over again taking that 1st step but now we know God has this.
When you make the decision to believe, you realize forgiveness is not an occasional act. It is a constant attitude. You are accepting the responsibility to love everyone just like Jesus did. When I made the decision to believe, I wanted everyone in my family to jump on my train and I told myself ‘when the time is right’ I’ll be able to ‘convince’ them Jesus needs to be their way to heaven. Then I read ‘the time is always right to do what is right’. I wish I could say I have witnessed with all my family - some yes - some a little. I’m still praying constantly but I’m only 1/2 way up the staircase on this subject. Why is it so hard to talk about Jesus to my adult children when they are the same children I taught about Jesus?
The decision to believe makes us even more thankful for hope. The dictionary says ‘a feeling that what we want to happen will happen’. The Bible definition says ‘trustful expectation, particularly with reference to the fulfillment of God’s promises. Biblical hope is the anticipation of a favorable outcome under God’s guidance’. Each of us has struggles ranging from being alone, fighting various health breakdowns, family or friend controversies, coping with husbands, coping withOUT husbands, and struggling with money to name some. I’m so glad each of us also knows God is our guide, our comforter, our rock that remains steadfast when everything around us crumbles. He is our constant companion who has promised never to leave us, not even for a moment.
Because we live in an earthly world of people desperately seeking hope, He wants our supply of hope to spill over and splash those around us, creating in them a curiosity to know our secret. We can’t concoct this hope in our own strength. God makes hope possible by the power of the Holy Spirit living in us. God’s hope is unchanging.
I have made the decision to believe His constant presence and faithfulness will provide hope and comfort in my times of letting go of control, having faith, and taking new steps.
Let’s pray: Dear God, we acknowledge You as the reason for hope. When life hurts, help us keep our thoughts fixed on the truth about who You are. Remind us that You live in us by the power of Your Holy Spirit and fill us to overflowing with a hope that reflects You to those around us. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
